Through the Enneagram Lens: Extraordinary Ordinary Things to Say

HiRes2Back in January, Inc. columnist Jeff Haden wrote an article entitled: 10 Things Extraordinary People Say Every Day.  They are:

  1. “Here is what I am thinking.”
  2. “I was wrong.”
  3. “That was awesome.”
  4. “You’re welcome.”
  5. “Can you help me?”
  6. “I’m sorry.”
  7. “Can you show me?”
  8. “Let me give you a hand.”
  9. “I love you.”
  10. Nothing

Haden suggests these short phrases can have a big impact on co-workers and colleagues,  friends and family, and ones self.  They have “the power to dramatically change someone’s day.”

I agree.

While great for all types, I think particular phrases can be especially powerful – and meaningful – coming from certain Enneagram types.

  1. “Here is what I am thinking.” – Thoughtful for reclusive Type 5’s.  Ideal for Type 9’s who typically shy away from sharing their opinion.
  2. “I was wrong.” – Perfect for Type 1’s.  Humbling, but great for Type 8’s who can jump the gun with a harsh response or too-rushed directive.
  3. “That was awesome.” – Share the spotlight Type 3’s.
  4. “You’re welcome.” – Take the spotlight Type 9’s.
  5. “Can you help me?” – Yes, you can ask for help Type 2’s.  You too Type 8’s.
  6. “I’m sorry.” – Acknowledge that it is not all fun and games Type 7’s.
  7. “Can you show me?” – Type 8’s you don’t have to have everything under control.
  8. “Let me give you a hand.” – Collaborate Type 4’s.
  9. “I love you.” – As Haden says, “No, not at work, but everywhere else.”  Type 5’s try it.
  10. Nothing – Some times the best reaction is no reaction.  This is an excellent exercise for us all, but particularly potent for projection expert Type 6’s.

Try it.  Let me know what happens.